Standing in the station, I was confronted by a board of destinations.
Where should i go?
I have the whole day ahead of me, I can go anywhere but yet…
My watch pings – mum messaged.
Mental note. Respond on the train.
Now. Back to the destination.
Platform 6, that sounds like a good start, lucky number and all.
I stand on the platform holding my Grande coconut latte from Starbucks, with an extra shot. Of course!
I have my Disney backpack on and I am raring to go.
The train arrives and I hop on board. Let this adventure begin.
Front facing window seat, with a table.
This is it, ready to go.
Where am I going?
The train stands stationary, the ticket man comes by and asks to see my ticket…
I don’t have my ticket yet, where does this train go?
To the end of the line, sir
That sounds nice, how long shall it take
How long is a piece of string, sir?
Oh yes, very well. One ticket, please.
One-way or return, sir?
I don’t know, is there a return?
Only you can decide that, sir, your destination is yours to choose.
Options. One-way, please.
Deliberating, where is the destination? Is it always the end of the line you strive for?
As I sit staring out the window, I wonder about the journey, the track. Single, straight, curved, broken…
The tracks can take any form, and the train may be delayed, it may even slow down. However
the train will always continue onward.
The announcement comes that this train is currently delayed, indefinitely.
Typical. Just, typical.
I put my headphones on and play the latest Disney soundtrack I purchased.
How often I get told Disney is for children, or Disney is not reality.
I never said it was, I have never even denied it’s not for children. Although, who ever said it’s not for adults. Adults take their children to Disney, do they not? And if it wasn’t for adults, why would they cater for so many adults around the globe.
Why am I not allowed to enjoy happiness?
There is so much judgement and dictation of what is right and wrong in life.
We talk of freedom of speech, but there is no freedom of thought.
Listening is crucial to life, yet we have to endure negativity and perseverance.
I dream and fantasise all day, everyday.
I put on my headphones, put on my fantasy and fall into a dream.
The train departs. The long journey is ahead. However, I don’t care. This is my moment, in my time.
Peace in my silence, and clearance of my mind. The melody of my dreams is here.
Where do I go? It’s always different and exciting…
Wait, someone has just nudged me.
A mother and her two children!
Mum, mum, mum. Look, it’s the seven dwarves. Mum. Mummy!
The young child is admiring my bag, as does most children.
Mother just rolls her eyes, she’ll never hear the end of this.
The judgement is unreal.
People judge, everybody does, it’s a part of life. Yet it is not judging, it is my opinion.
Yes, that shirt is missing two buttons and no, those shoes do not go with that outfit.
However, those are all just observations.
Vogue itself has some questionable outfits. Although I am not here for that.
Headphones. Noise cancelling turned on.
Back to my happy place. Back to the journey.
The train is moving, the journey continues.
I close my eyes and let it flow.
Where am I going?
End of the line.
Life is full of mystery and uncertainty, however the most important part of life are the emotions.
Everyday we fuel the engine and continue to sail through life. Emotions are the crew that help run your ship: fuelling the fire, cleaning the windows, hosting the parties and manning the bridge to ensure smooth sailing.
Recently this ship was anchored, the fire died out, the windows became hazy, and the parties stopped. Before us was an option of passages, but the maps were missing, the captain unsure on what to do. The only option for now was to anchor.
Panic was rife in the darkened bridge, crew sifting through the ships manuals and map archives, to decide on the correct passage.
In front were three options, only one would continue the journey. Without the map, the uncertainty was paramount. At the horizon the sun was setting, the only land to be seen was the solitude island in front. What was on the island?
The curious purser wanted to explore, the anxious engineers wanted to move, the cautious cleaners wanted to clean everything, and the captain surrounded by such confusion had no crew to turn to.
Would the island hold an answer? Should we go left, should we go right? Without guidance the ship would circle the island burning the fuel, wasting energy all the while waiting for the captain’s decision.
The maps, the archives, the weather patterns…what would be the deciding factor?
A distress call to home base was to be the only answer at this time. Until a reply, the ship would have to wait.
To keep the crew in high spirits, the entertainers arranged a party, filling the bars and playing the music, lighting the dancefloor.
Day one passed and the party continued; no answer.
Day Two the party was stalled, the cleaners gave up, caution taking over the mop and the engineers getting fidgety, unable to move, being overwhelmed by the frustrated technicians. The captain lost in the silence. The ship numbed.
Day Three, the storm had come in the night, freezing the waters around. No answer, no call, the decision still pending. The captain, perplexed by the out of character crew members, decided to walk round and visit all the crew. Frustration, Depression, Anxiety, Fear, Worry, Reason, Hope, Happiness, Excitement, Resentment, Guilt, Grace, Dignity. And Acceptance.
Day Four, the speakers muffled and noises appeared, yet no clear message was heard. The cleaners returned, the engineers stilled, the bridge was warmed, the storm may have passed and the ship was calmed. Yet before us the decision was still be made.
Day Five, the muffled noises appeared again, but the crew continued. The captain was in control of his ship, his crew, and his decision. Until home base got through, All options would be considered, the exploration would go ahead. The captain would explore.
The ship is anchored and still waiting but the crew are high-spirited, Hope at the bows, cheering for the destination.
Never let the ship stall, or ignore the crew. Without them the ship would sink.
Be the captain, work with the crew, you have to make the decisions and the decisions determine the destination.
Lift the anchor, fuel the engines, dazzle the sea-king and you will rule the oceans.
After fifteen hours…or was it five hours? Possibly five minutes!
Painful, suffering and hanging. There is only one final cure to the all mighty hangover – a flight. A gruesome, stuffy, cold and obligatory social event. Having been split from my sunshine buddy, I was uncaringly positioned next to what my mother would call ‘a lovely couple’. Totally and utterly unloving. The aisle seat meant standing every twenty minutes as their aging bladders flushed, worst of all I don’t recall them drinking at any point during the horrible experience. Cheshire cat smile, turned to the right: ‘sorry dear, bad news’; only half praying I would die immediately from the alcohol poisoning. However, no such luck. Let us endure.
Every so often my friend would turn to me, she being across the aisle: ‘Are you alright?”, my return; the dreaded ‘I’m fine’, hold my head and give the death stare.
Patsy. as I chose to call her, comes back for the fifth time. I started to count because my kindle was too blurry and well, earphones were only going to add to the almighty swelling. Entertainment unbearably limited. Maybe the trolley shall engage me for more than five minutes; how long had we been flying for?
”Can I get you anything to drink, a snack maybe?’
Yes! Someone who understands my needs! Tea, please, no milk or sugar. As the beautiful, yet rather aged air steward passed what would be my life saviour at this moment in time, I could only help but admire the steam swim through the cabin until… ‘sorry dear’ – this was the moment when I looked at her ‘Would a cork help?’. Although wishful thinking did not prevail, I instead grudgingly rose from my crammed, saggy leather chair returning a callous smile. Back to my tea – heaven!
Sixteen soothing minutes I had taken to soak PG Tips into my weakened immune system. Sixteen painfree, carefree, teaful pleasures. Every sip a constant remember of natures medicine. Playing with the tea spinner, a worthless utensil and waste of the environment, however a handy toy weakening the demon flight. On Patsy’s imminent return from the milehigh lavy, I noticed she was going to speak, but knew fine well it was going to overpower the sixteen minutes of peace and tranquility.
Yes! Not only did she indulge me of her sixth trip to the ‘horrid loo’, but continued to describe the remnants of the last passengers visit. Luckily for you faithful reader, I shall not transcribe. Suppose, what else would someone of her age talk to a ‘handsome young fella’ about. Uncontrollably I had to react with gasps and tuttings, agreeing with the inconsideration and disgust. Only knowing full well my first trip was due. Maybe there was another one I could use.
First visit. Fine.
Snoozing seemed responsible at this time. The tea soothing my head, the little reading tiring my eyes, and the consistent counting shutting down my battered brain. Climbing into the overhead locker, I retrieved my personalised hoody, hoping to show it off to the half wakened cabin where there may be a potential husband. It was only a matter of time until I would switch back to ‘project husband’.
Patsy returned, her husband in tow. He only taken his third trip. They tilted their heads, closed their eyes, and I knew this was my opportunity to catch some shuteye.
It was time for landing turning out that I had been asleep for two hours. Rather pleased with myself however Davie (Patsy`s named husband) grouling at my snoring. Two hours of snoring versus unwanted chit chat and consistent lavy trips, I believe we were on par with frustrations. My head felt much better however knew my continued moments beyond the flight would be daunting and not so pleasant.
Walking. Queue. Passport Control. Walking. Baggage. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. Pick Up. Drive. Police. Drive. Pick Up. Drive. Drive. Home.
The sunshine was pleasant for a week but nothing beats crawling into your own bed.
The Hangover was cured.
Aha! Mirror, I must go and keep my vanity intact by taking lots of selfies and sweeping my hair…
The total impact of being vain may lead to people shaking their head and rolling their eyes, however what is so wrong with admiring ones self in the mirror? Well, shall I tell you?
Self consciousness is something many people suffer from, myself included. I am so self-conscious that i continuous look in a mirror to make sure that a. my hair is still intact, b. my clothes are the same, c. that I have no spots or anything else hideous on my face, d. make sure I am who I say I am…this could go on for a while.
One problem though, do I truly see myself in the mirror? The only way to truly see what others do is by skipping bodies, which at this moment in time is not an option…unless some crazy scientist has invented a body transfer machine, anyone? What would that even be called; suggestions?
I write all this in a form of confusion but as an observer of the World. They say that no individual is the same, no person can be completely identical. If so, then everyone must have differing observations of the world. My hypothesis is that if I see the colour green and my friend sees the colour green, does that mean everyone in the world sees green? Certainly not. In a superficial sense, yes everyone will see an object however there is no way to guarantee it is identical – The thought process of the brain is similar.
Once upon a time there was a little boy who lived with his parents. One day is mommy asked him if he was going to move out and to his mothers surprise he replied “Why mother? Have you had enough of me? Would you rather I abandoned you?”. What a harsh and cruel thing to say to ones mother, however this is not seen as a fairytale…because fairies would never be cruel, right? Ha! It is all encapsulated in a sense of what we are told to believe. Children grow up being told an abundance of lies to ensure they have a ‘happy’ childhood, but is the child really happy when they find out that our favourite fat man is not a physical being to which we can touch? Believing is seeing after all. And the little boy did live happily ever after because…well, after all I am writing the story. A writer makes all the rules and conveys the stories, truths, lies and outcomes which she or he chooses.
I do not write all this to depress and sadden everyone’s views of life, but your views and mine are completely different. If you were to sit and agree with everything I said without protest then I would know you are lying, even at least one thought. We are all created equal, not identical! No better time to find out about a persons opinions than when a General Election is looming or even a referendum. I shall not be giving specific examples of how pathetic some individuals are however I will commend them for expression a view and opinion. We live in a democracy and have the right to our own opinion however I condone those who find it appropriate to break the law to express these views. My opinion, is it yours?
As with the writer who writes a novel, script, poem or anything readable; we are the writers of our life and what we see in the mirror is what we choose to see. Today I am looking fat and scruffy, someone may say I look average and clean; another may suggest I am adorable and handsome…all to which no agreement can be made. A mirror is a token to show yourself you are alive and to appreciate that moment. Judge yourself if you wish, however be appreciative of the moment you have to look. Take a flash at what you have achieved and in that mirror you will see the individual you wish to think. Think positive and you shall be positive.
But for now I must find my selfie stick…
Little Town, it’s a quiet village…wait!
My town is by far little and in all honesty if I were to go walking through the high street in a blue dress and a basket singing about the wonderful people, I would most sincerely get a slap in the face and taken to one of those ‘special places’; and I assure you, it ain’t pleasant. Not only because I am male, but because the people of this town do not appreciate a good thing when they see it.
Oh kay! So I do not live in a fantasy world and realise this is reality, however who can stop me from dreaming? No one! Not one single person can stop your mind and your dreams from being a major part of your life. Now why am I talking about dreams and fantasy so often? Well, from my initial quote, you fabulous Disney fans out there will have realised it is the opening line from Beauty and The Beast. My favourite Disney movie of all time, with Frozen having to get a special mention although that is a different converstaion for a different day.
I live my life with a little bit of excitement and to some it can be a rather annoying although if they are annoyed then they are not on my page. My page is full of colour and pictures and music and laughter…to name but a few. And in my life I do realise that it is a reality and there are moments to be serious, but I literally mean moments. When I go into a meeting, I put on that ‘straight ‘ face to show that I am sincere and speak true my opinions. However once that door is open it is back to Main Street USA. The castle is in front of my and the crossroads gives so many options for the rest of the day. Do I head into the future, into past or do I parade through the castle into fantasyworld? The decisions are magical.
For the past consecutive 6 years I have been fortunate enough to visit Walt Disney World and I have never once gotten bored of it all. Every day brings a new adventure and there is always something new to discover. Discovery is something we should all try. Rather than sticking to the same thing constantly, put a little excitement into your life. I understand I may be calling the little teapot white however I always try new things when I visit the same destinations.
Walking through the gates at the Magic Kingdom is surreal. I cannot describe it to those who have never experienced it and I can honestly say that there are certain people out there who destest every moment of being in the ‘Happiest Place on Earth’ but I am not one of them. And hope to never be! Are you one of those people?
Even those who do not like Disney have their own little dream world to live in, whether it be Star Wars conventions or baking a cake…or even reading a book! Every person has their Disney doppleganger character whether they wish to find out or not. I always get compared to Peter Pan and I suppose in all honesty it seems the best fit. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to just go to Never Neverland and be adolescent forever. Pity I am no longer an adolescent and well into my career, but at least I can close my eyes and live it. Dream it!
A Dream is a wish your heart makes!
Now I ask you, which Disney character are you? And even if you don’t like Disney, which character in a book, movie or even play is you?
Goodbye for now.
A well deserved return to the Classy Guide to Life.
The festive season is upon us and guess what? It is only the middle of November. What better celebration than to celebrate christmas long before the advent begins? I am somewhat of a tinsel freak and love celebrating christmas all year round however I do refrain from watching Christmas movies all year round or singing christmas songs. But the thought of christmas just makes me uncontrollably happy. It always as from when I was a little kid.
The most annoying thing about christmas is christmas shopping! What do you buy the ones you love when they have everything? You ask what they want and its always the same reply “I don’t want anything” or “don’t spend your money on me”; and in reality, if you actually didnt buy them anything they would be heartbroken. I mean who actually anticipates christmas morning without receiving any form of gift. I do not want or desire anything this christmas therefore everything shall be a most pleasant surprise. I am not one for wanting things. I do have dreams and fantasies for all the grandeur I would love to be surrounded in, however that is not realistic. Christmas is a time for sharing and caring, therefore I look to my family and the ones that I love.
The true celebration of christmas seems to have been lost long ago, and it has been through time and history that we have fabricated the story of the baby Jesus and celebrating the new born king. Now it is all about the biggest gifts and who does the best Santa impersonation. How Santa must be incredibly embarassed and ashamed with what some people do with his image? The red suit is back in fashion ones more. But let us leave the true Santa costume to the man himself. Fake beards do not go down too well.
Speaking of beards. Whats is with all the younger guys going about with beards? I mean, seriously? Are you kidding me? Is this meant to be high fashion because I see it as just sheer laziness and not attractive! But that is my opinion and I have never been a fan of facial hair. However it is different in and older man who is over the age of 50, preferrably into retirment age. It seems more fitting and they suit it better. But not for someone who verging on the age of 21 but looking they should be turning 61. It is just totally wrong.
Anyways, Santa suits the white beard and well…a clean shaven Santa would never be recognised.
Just had to have that little rant in there. But anyways it is christmas time and it is time for cheer and laughter and happy ever after…until January third (in Scotland) where there shall be a mass queue outside the gym and everybody implementing their new years resolutions. However that is ages away! There is christmas shopping to be done so I advice everyone to start pronto if they havent already been buying over the past few months (raise your hands) like my myself. 2014 is going to be awesome year for Christmas celebrations.
Tis the season to be jolly.
The Christmas Microbiologist
I must apologise for my absence from the blogging world however my life became somewhat busier within the past two months. How so? Well I started my distance learning Masters program alongside being a relationship with the most incredible man ever; and I am still working in my enjoyable but moanaminute job.
I understand that everyone describes their partners as the ‘most incredible’ person ever, however I must agree that it may be somewhat of an exaggeration although I know no different and he makes me happy. I overthink absolutely every minor detail and can manage to destroy my life through my bizarre and paranoid mind. I am my mother’s child!
But most importantly, I am happy and I always get excited when he texts me or even better, calls me. It is remarkable that my life could take such a dramatic turn. This time last year I was dreaming of man, a doctor, or even worse, a sales assistant who dreams of the millionare lifestyle but still has ambition. Ambition and life and truth are all but a part of who I am however the person I wish to be with must portray these characteristics for me to like and trust. My bow, is it wrong of me to call him that? He is incredible, he is truthful and a pain in fucking arse…but I love him! I do…I love him! Love? I am the most romantic individual I know, I just want to show my love and affection and be cheesy in romance. I want to send him flowers and write him love poetry and just…make him know that although he is not romantic, I will never stop being romantic. Never! I will never change and he has assured, although in a callous manner, that he will never change, for anyone. I don’t want him too, why change who he is when I love him for who he is?
I love my boyfriend…could I marry him? We shall see…he needs to ask me first!
For now, let us set aside my love life and focus on what my recent months activities have entailed. Recently, Vanya and I ventured on our first break away together. We had planned to go to Amsterdam for her birthday last year however that never came about, but this year…it did! And at the end of September we went on the dfds seasways minicruise to Amsterdam from Newcastle. What a marvellous city? It is spectacular, it is breathtaking, magnificent, transcendent…there is so much beauty in the architecture. Romance. Romantic novels come to live in this city, all at once. The canals are so calm and peaceful and map out the city. The city is completely different from any I am visited elsewhere in the World. Although that list is still minute, I do not think I will ever find another city as similar or as beautiful! Shall I be proved wrong? I shall need to wait and see, I love surprises.
So, this was an ‘express’ trip to Amsterdam where we spent a maximum of 5 hours in the City. What did we do? We managed to go a canal cruise, tour the Van Gogh Museum, get photographs of the IAmsterdam sign, as well walk through the city and ride a tram. Also we had hotdogs with sauerkraut. It was spectacular and I cannot wait to one day go back and enjoy it and be able to absorb it all. The architecture was stunning and so unique. I took many photographs and was hoping to share them with this post however the files have not uploaded in the format I was hoping so alas I shall need to wait until they are formatted properly.
For now I shall leave you and hope that the next post will not be so long.